A Grownup's Guide To Texting

Anything much longer than 160 characters belongs in an email, or pick up the phone. As Maralee McKee, the Manners Mentor, says, Think of texts as preludes or follow-ups to a conversation, not the conversation itself.

Texting is for quick questions and practical matters: Chocolate fudge or Cherries Garcia? You can also use it to let a pal know that you're stuck in traffic. But if you're going to be a no-show, pick up the phone and call. Texting to cancel plans is just plain rude.

Unless you're absolutely certain that the person whom you're texting has your number, spare yourself the awkward Who's this? by identifying yourself. Likewise, make sure that you clearly label your own friends, and recheck numbers to verify that you're texting the right person. It's very easy to click on the wrong phone book entry, especially when you know Bryan, Brian and Brad.

Because texting is, at its best, brief, there's an ever-growing array of emoticons to help the texter convey tone. The smiley face, the sad face and the winking face are indispensable. Used sparingly, these expressions can head off potential misunderstandings and keep the mood friendly.

In the world of texting, acronyms are almighty. It's fine to use familiar shorthand like LOL, BTW and FYI, but steer clear of obscure ones like RAEBNC (Read And Enjoyed, But No Comment). And while abbreviating you as u or are as r is acceptable, avoid ur—it could mean your or you're. Abbreviations are meant to save time, not cause confusion.

If there's ever any confusion over a text's meaning or any other possible tension between you and a friend or partner, quit typing and pick up the phone so you can start talking. Plenty can get lost in translation during a back-and-forth texting spat.

When it comes to texting, the medium truly is the message, writes Christopher Null in PCWorld. It is almost never appropriate to conduct important conversations about relationships, major life events, or critical work issues via text message, where the conversation invariably comes off as flippant. Save the good news/bad news/sad news for face-to-face, or at least voice-to-voice.

A casual thank-you via text—for, say, a cup of coffee—is fine. When you owe a bigger debt of gratitude—to the people who helped you move, for instance—take the time to call.

Planning a dinner party? Don't group text your guest list. Instead, send an invitation the old-fashioned way—by email.