Cheaters, Deconstructed

He's Anxious

A man who is afraid of intimacy might have affairs as a way of avoiding true connection, says Wanis. While this aversion seems like an obvious catalyst for an affair, a recent study published in Archives of Sexual Behavior found a more unusual fear-based variable for predicting infidelity: performance anxiety. "Sexual anxiety might cause a man to stray as a way to build his sexual confidence," says Wanis, adding that extreme stress often causes the performance anxiety. "One client told me that he thought that if he had sex with more women, he would become less sensitized and could last longer in bed. He overcame his sexual anxiety and his cheating by dealing with the root cause: his belief that he wasn't good enough."