Game, Set & Cyber-Match

5. Beware of Red Flags

Psychologists at the University of Wisconsin at Madison found that online daters who used fewer first-person pronouns—presumably to avoid spelling out who they really are—were more likely to be lying. And, according to Davis, when a man says “I hate drama,” he means he has plenty ­already; “ready to move on” implies that he's not; the words intimacy, massages, and pleasurable all roughly translate to creep alert!; and “I'm not sure exactly how to describe myself” is code for low self-esteem. And if a profile seems short—like a guy is hiding something—he probably is.

6. Make Contact

Webb suggests keeping messages brief—98 words each, ideally—and individualized to each recipient: Ask yourself, What do I like about him? Choose three new people to e-mail a day until you have a full roster of prospects, Davis advises, and take it off-line quickly—a date should be set up in six or fewer e-mails. “Stop wasting time debating whether you should wait until tomorrow or Tuesday to write back to your match,” she counsels, “just hit Reply.”