Getting Over Post-Wedding Jitters
How to conquer your ten biggest marriage fears
6. "I'll resent him for sacrifices I made."
When life doesn't happen as you envisioned it's tempting to fault him for not traveling or leaving behind relatives when you moved for his job. But don't go there, says Dr. Hokemeyer. "Relationships involve constant negotiation," he says. "There are trade-offs to be made, battles to be won, lost and surrendered. Blaming a partner for your disappointments will ultimately corrode your relationship." Instead, put into perspective all the good things you have. Then, says Dr. Greer, "recapture whatever you put on the shelf," as in, revisit an old interest or pick back up on an unfinished goal.
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7. "I'll get less attractive with age while he'll get 'distinguished,' leading him to look elsewhere."
Many women agonize over getting older. That's because aging gracefully has been lost in our era of surgically altered televised beauty, says Dr. Hokemeyer. To assure your husband sees that you're beautiful inside and out, start feeling good about yourself, advises Dr. Greer. "If you're concerned about your appearance, take action. Get a new haircut, get to the gym, do something," she says. Dr. Tessina agrees, adding that your husband won't cheat simply because someone prettier is out there. "There's always someone more attractive, but she's an unknown quantity. He loves you."
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