9 to 5 Flirtation
How to have a work "husband"—without crossing the line
2. Should you tell your partner about your work husband?
Many people are of the mindset that what you don't know can't hurt you. The problem with this theory is it becomes even more hurtful when your partner finds out. You may want to protect their feelings or keep them from getting jealous, since you think it's unwarranted, but keeping things from your partner is a sign of a larger problem.
"The secrecy creates a further bond between you and your work [husband]," says Dr. Jenn. "It creates more excitement. I definitely think you should tell your partner about this other person. I wouldn't present it in a threatening way, but they should know of the people in your life."
Dr. Walsh shares a similar sentiment. "If you don't tell your spouse about your work husband, you have to ask yourself why. Are you protecting your spouse from unnecessary feelings of jealousy or are you keeping a secret back-up plan?"
Secrecy can be destructive for a relationship, so if you feel like you have to hide a relationship you have at work, you should pinpoint what's behind that decision, and how you as a couple can work on being more honest and authentic.