Biggest Red Flag Jobs

Self-Proclaimed Artist

“I have a thing for broke-as-a-joke artist types. The worst was my independent filmmaker boyfriend, for whom I picked up every tab, and spent "romantic" nights working on his movies and bringing him espresso for his all-night editing sessions. Good thing he was still collecting unemployment checks because his films were pretty terrible. “

Self-Proclaimed Philosopher

“I met a guy in a coffee shop and he told me he was a 'philosopher.' We swapped email addresses, and he soon messaged me to ask me out. That’s when I discovered he actually signs his emails with this full name followed by ‘Philosopher.' He turned out to be way too high and mighty for me — giving himself the same title as Socrates should have been my clue.”

Guilt-Giving Guru

“My ex worked at one of those health retreats where people pay to be told what to eat, when to sleep and how long to exercise for an entire week. Initially, I respected him for helping people improve their health and reach their goals. What wasn’t so cool was when he berated me the first time he witnessed me give in to a fast food craving.”

Self-Centered Executive

“I was out with my friends when this man approached me, gave me his card and said, ‘Now, when you go home and Google me you’re going to find out I’m an actor — but I’m also a high-power executive ... so why don’t you check my profile on LinkedIn while you’re at it.’ Ugh, no thanks.”

ON THE LBB: More Dating Red Flags

Insecure Comic

“The comedy profession exhibits some serious red flags in my experience. Not only was my comedian ex a bore when sitting down, but his need to make people laugh as both his job and his identity was a key ingredient in a recipe for self-loathing. And his spine crumbled a little more each time I laughed at another man's joke. The laughter literally tore us apart.”

Mooching-Off-Mom Waiter

“A guy I dated had been working as a waiter for over a decade and claimed to be doing so 'just for fun' — at almost 35 years old. When I found out that he still lived at home, and didn’t chip in for rent or food, I knew he was not the ambitious, or even grown-up, man I was looking for.”

Professional Drifter

“I met a man at a friend’s party and we soon started dating. We spent a lot of time at my place — he always wanted to sleep over. I got suspicious as to why we never went to his house. It turned out that every night he wasn’t with me he lived at the youth hostel … and he was just using me for my apartment.”

ON THE LBB: Dating Dealbreakers