A Married Man Goes Undercover On AshleyMadison.com to Find Out Why Women Cheat
According to a recent study, nearly 50 percent of married women and 60 percent of married men will have an extramarital affair.Jupiterimages/Brand X Pictures/Thinkstock
"Honey, I have to join Ashley Madison."
So began the pitch I gave my wife to let me join the marrieds-looking-for-affairs website, AshleyMadison.com. It would be part of my research into women who cheat, why infidelity is increasing, and what can be done to possibly affair-proof a marriage. I proposed to "cheat" on her for a few weeks, to talk to and attempt to seduce as many women as possible, and get a real-world understanding of why women want to stay married but also need some illicit action on the side.
Of course, on my end, there'd be nothing more than conversation. She looked at me straight-faced, unflinching. I searched her eyes for any telltale sign of the Charles-I'm-going-to-punch-you-in-the-face-right-after-I-castrate-you look; nothing. After a long pause, I got her only thought: "No, I get it," she said emphatically. "It's a great story. But it's kinda like asking the newly-vegetarian fox to guard the henhouse, isn't it?"
I thought about it, and unfortunately her statement wasn't too far from the truth. If you back me up a few years — sans wife, kids, dogs, published book on relationships, 400,000+ fans following my relationship advice on Facebook — I was a chronic womanizer; a past she knows about, but never experienced personally. To make matters worse, I wasn't some weak pick-up artist using idiotic dating boot camp approaches that reeked of negativity and douchebaggery on vulnerable women in order to break them down and manipulate them into sex. No, I was far more despicable than that.