Second Time Around
Four Couples Who Got Divorced ... Then Remarried Each Other
Celeste Simmons-Bacon and Alan Bacon, Kennesaw, Georgia
In 1997, Celeste Simmons and Alan Bacon got married for the most common of reasons: They were in love. During their first six years of marriage, they had two children together — and Alan had an affair. “He left me for the other woman when our younger child was an infant — and the most devastating thing was finding out that the affair began when I was pregnant,” says Celeste. After the divorce, her life bottomed out: She lost her house, moved in with her parents, suffered from depression. Slowly, though, she put things back together and, after a year or so, she was involved with someone else. Meanwhile, Alan's relationship didn't last, and he moved to be nearer to his children. “We talked because of the kids, but also because we both wanted to heal the hurt feelings.” It took a couple of years, but soon the pair was talking about trying again, and made a decision to move in together. “It was a mistake right then,” says Celeste. “We still hadn't really forgiven each other, and I still didn't trust him.” That reconciliation lasted six months. Another half-year later, they tried again — and this time, sought counseling from their minister. In 2005, two years post-divorce, they remarried.
Why it worked the second time around: “We can finally talk about everything without tears or bitterness,” says Celeste, adding that she's able to stand on her own two feet. “I'm much smarter now, about money, about what it takes to keep us going, about everything.” Marriage education is key, says Bisacre. Even more so than in a first marriage, “go into your second with your eyes wide open.” It's also valuable, she says, to find a second-marriage support group. “You can learn from others who've been there, and also be inspired.”