10 Sneaky Sex-Drive Stealers

Sex Drive Stealer #3: Perfectionism

Your husband's in the mood, but you're not. After all, how could you be? There's unfolded laundry piled high on the bed, you just got back from the gym (and haven't even showered yet) and the baby is probably going to wake up for his 9PM feeding any second. Sound familiar? "Perfectionism places a huge burden on sex drive," says Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD, MS, PT, a psychologist and physical therapist in Dallas. "A perfectionist thinks she needs to look and smell perfect, her mate must be perfect and the environment must be perfect." Here's the problem: "This state of perfection, of course, is impossible," she continues. "Because of this, the perfectionist is stressed out about the flaws rather than enjoying time with her partner."

How to Feel Sexy Again: "Give yourself, and your partner, a break," says Dr. Lombardo. "Make your goal to have fun and enjoy intimacy rather than have it be perfect. That's all he wants from you, after all."

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