10 Unspoken Marriage Rules

8. Log off.

When your attention is focused elsewhere, your spouse is bound to feel unimportant. So make quality time a top priority and restrict tech gadget use if necessary, says Dr. Wish. "Pay attention to the concept of ratio: How much time am I spending doing this compared to how much time I'm spending with my family?" she says. Create a rule that works for your household and stick to it, whether it's no devices at the dinner table, shutting down phones at 8 p.m. or going gadget-free on weekend afternoons.

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9. Don't use the "D" word (divorce, that is).

Even in the heat of an argument, avoid threatening to pack your bags or head to the lawyer's office. Besides the "D" word being downright hurtful, repeated warnings may result in a spouse calling the other"s bluff. "We act as if the intensity of our anger gives us license to say or do anything," says Dr. Lerner. "But threatening divorce is never useful, and it only makes the probability of separation more likely."