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Vow of Silence

What You Should Never Say to Your Best Friend

Page: 7 of 9
  • "I wish my husband were as great as yours!"

    Why wouldn't it be wonderful to hear you've scored big in the life-partner department? Because the friend who says this is subtly (or not so subtly) downgrading her own spouse, which can be awkward for the person on the other side of the conversation. "A friend said that to me about my husband when she was going through a divorce," says Shelly.* Feeling uncomfortable and unwilling to bash her friend's spouse, Shelly's taken to responding with, "Yep, he's a good guy," and changing the subject.

    While occasional compliments are completely fine, avoid making comparisons: "They reveal jealousy," says Glass. If you're having problems with your partner, then you can certainly ask your happily married buddy for advice, adds Melton, "but since every relationship is unique, a comparison isn't a good way to start that conversation."

Vow of Silence
What You Should Never Say to Your Best Friend
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