What He's Really Thinking Before the Wedding

Conversation Starters

"Can we talk about something else?" Getting married is big news, but not necessarily the only thing a guy wants to talk about. “It was a little awkward [telling everyone], 'Hey, we're engaged!' But Facebook made it easier," says Brad, 27, who married last Memorial Day weekend. "Then I couldn't wait for it be over so people can start asking me about other things. I wondered what would change once we were married. Turned out, nothing—just titles."

Planning Perils

"Why does it have to be so complicated?" Apparently guys can't just nod their heads and smile during preparations. "Wedding planning is the worst," says Greg, 29, who will be married this October. "Deciding on the tables was way more complicated than I imagined,” Brad recalls. "Figuring out who can or should sit with each other was like planning an Israeli-Palestinian negotiation."

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Must Be Dust

"I can't cry." Ravi, 30, married two months ago, reveals what many of the other grooms probably think too. “I was flat-out afraid of getting a little too emotional during the ceremony. My brother-in-law told me how his brother was a slobbering mess at his wedding, and I did not want that to be me.”

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Boots Knocking

"Someone will inevitably hook up." There's just something about weddings that makes people take off their pants, which is fine with the grooms, as long as it doesn't end messy. "I can envision a couple of pairings that might want to have some fun together," says Greg. "I can also envision a few that could end badly."

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Game Time

"I hope my team's not playing." Sports fanatics aren't any less invested in the wedding, but they would just prefer that a big event doesn't kick off while they're at the altar. "I checked the sports calendar when we were picking the date," says Brad. "We ended up with the weekend of the PGA Championship, but I decided that was OK. Plus, we would be done by Sunday afternoon, so I could watch the end of the final round."

Down the Hatch

"How much should I drink at my wedding?" This is a question Greg asked himself, with his wedding only three months away. "I don't want to get bombed and either make an ass out of myself or forget part of the night.” Brad echoes the sentiment: "I thought, Better make sure I don't get too drunk. You don't want to be 'that guy' at your own wedding." "But then again," says Greg, “all of these other people are drinking on my dime. … Why should they have all the fun?”

Making The Rounds

"I want people to know I appreciate them being here." Some guests come a long way for the wedding, many of whom the groom doesn't often get to see. "I wanted to make sure I spent some time with each guest," says Sean, 31, married this past April. "I still managed to mess it up. At the rehearsal dinner, I made it to two out of 11 tables. At the wedding, I made it to maybe five out of about 18.”

Is This Registering?

"I hope people buy from the registry." "Please, I beg of you, don't go off the grid and buy us a crystal candy bowl for a gift," says Ben, 32, who will be taking the plunge soon, speaking to the imagined cavalier gift-giver. "There's a reason we didn't put it on our registry in the first place. I would likely end up putting coins and paper clips in it and wish you had just followed simple protocol.”