Why I Cheated On My Husband
5 Unfaithful Women Explain How You Can Learn From Their Mistakes
"I was bored and unhappy."
At 35 years old, Barbara Gisborne was living the American dream. She lived in Madison, Wis., with her loving husband and two children—but she was miserable. "My husband was a good man, but I was bored inside and out," she says. "In our community, I always felt like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole." That year, she was in Chicago on business and met Bob, an Australian man, on an elevator. "We had an instant connection. We exchanged numbers, kept in touch, and I decided to fly out to Australia to see him and get him out of my system," she says. "Instead, I fell in love." She left everything she knew—her hometown, her husband, her job and her country—to start her life over with Bob in Australia. "I became strong, independent, confident and much worldlier," she says. "That was 25 years ago, and now I can say that my affair was the turning point in my life's journey. Today, Bob and I are married, own a winery in Australia, and have five children and 10 grandchildren between us."
What You Can Learn: Though Barbara's story ended up with a "happily ever after," that's not always the case when it comes to infidelity, so Silverman suggests looking inside yourself if you're unhappy or bored with your relationship. "Healthy relationships grow and evolve, and feeling bored is a symptom of relationship stagnation. Rather than having an affair, increase the romance, change habitual patterns within the relationship, and communicate more about your feelings and needs." If you just need a change of pace, then try booking an exotic vacation with your husband or girlfriends, or discuss moving to a new city and starting over.
ON ELLE: Why Men Cheat
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